REST: WHY IT IS ELUSIVE AND HOW TO REFOCUS | PART 4
How do we rest?
Everyone approaches rest differently. One size does not fit all. This may be surprising, because we were taught that Sabbath or “true” rest has to look a certain prescribed way. In other words, one size does fit all. The fact of the matter is that we are all created uniquely and wonderfully. There is no one of us alike. Thus one key question is, what kind of rest is restful to you? What does well-rest or fully recharged rest look like for you? I believe this is where we need to know ourselves. This will take time to hone in and narrow down what well-rest looks like for each of us. Finding what works is a critical discovering process. For example, there is a significant difference between introverts and extroverts. Introverts in general would not consider interacting with others as rest or recharging. On the other hands, extroverts in general would not consider being alone as rest. One might say that there are then all kinds of combinations in between. Below are some thoughts related to how we rest.
· Solitude and silence
Whether we are introverts or extroverts, rest is not possible without solitude. And solitude is not possible without silence. Can we hurry up and be still? There are myriads of books and articles on solitude and silence. In order for us to truly rest, we have to come to a place where we can be honest with ourselves, our true self. We cannot experience vulnerability with ourselves without solitude and silence. We have to recognize what our “burdens” are or where we are tired and heavy laden as we come to Jesus. Solitude and silence force us to recognize where we are. Otherwise, we keep running around doing things, which is the opposite destination from solitude and silence.
· Praying and playing[1]
Invariably, what will constitute well-rest is a combination of both “praying and playing” according to how God created us. Eugene Peterson articulates praying and playing well as one of his points in the book.
Puritan sabbaths that eliminated play were a disaster. Secular Sabbaths that eliminate prayer are worse. Sabbath-keeping involves both playing and praying. The activities are alike enough to share the same day and different enough to require each other for a complementary wholeness.[2]
· Physical rest: sleep and eat
Psalm 3:5 says, “I lay down and slept; I woke again, for the Lord sustained me”. Notice what follows a verse later: “I will not be afraid of many thousands of people who have set themselves against me all around”. We cannot undervalue and de-spiritualize the necessity of sleep as it relates to rest. We know the story of Elijah under a broom tree (1 Kings 19:1-18). Obviously depleted and utterly dejected enough to ask God to take his life, there is a repeated theme of God allowing Elijah to sleep, eat, and drink. Sometimes we too are so depleted and discouraged, the only way we can connect to God meaningfully is to sleep and eat!
· Reduce Stress
Stress is directly proportional to change. Unprecedented change is upon us and it is not about to slow down. There is a big difference between good stress and toxic stress. Only the dead have no stress. We all need stress to a certain degree. The level of tolerance is also different from person to person. We cannot reduce unhealthy stress without creating margin. Margin, simply put, is the difference between time and commitments. Creating margin sometimes will force us to say no to requests and demands. Let us face it. It is very difficult for us to say no, especially in ministry contexts.
The bottom line is that rest has to matter in our body, mind, soul, and spirit—in all that we are. Different people will experience as rest a different combination of these qualities.
[1] Eugene Peterson in his fine book, Working the Angles: The shape of pastoral integrity, notes, “praying and playing are deeply congruent with each other and have extensive inner connections, noted and commented upon by a wide range of philosophers and theologians. John Calvin filled his Sabbath with both. His reputation for humorless austerity doesn’t prepare us for the facts: he led his congregation in prayers in the morning and in the afternoon went among the people of Geneva and played skittles.”
[2] Peterson E. (1987) Working the Angles: The Shape of Pastoral Integrity. William B. Eerdmans Publishing Company. p. 75.