HAPPY ALONG THE WAY — free as the sky

Just the other blissfully ordinary day, we had a coffee date with a young couple through a mutual friend’s introduction. The wife is a childhood friend of a 3rd generation Korean Japanese woman who came to stay with us a few weeks ago. She found out that the couple lives next to our apartment building in Kuala Lumpur. Since we all received the news as a special coincidence and providence, she, her husband, and we were eager to meet each other.

We met at an outdoor Indonesian café on a breezy and bearable afternoon, thanks to the army of ceiling fans above. The wife works for a Japanese company in Kuala Lumpur and the husband joined her recently, also working for a Japanese company in Penang, Malaysia. Even though he was wearing a loose T-shirt, his solid chiseled upper body underneath the shirt was undeniable, and I could easily imagine him as a gym rat. Sure enough, the wife told us that his criteria for choosing an apartment in Mont Kiara squarely depended on what kind of fitness gym they had. They seemed content to be a weekend couple. But they seemed happier, living in Malaysia. They don’t see themselves going back to Japan anytime soon. We shared our pleasurable weeklong experience back in March in Tokyo, Japan while noticing their proud smile.

Incidentally, the wife studied for one year during her high school in Michigan, as the only Asian in the entire school. Serendipitously, she played high school basketball during the year. My eyes lit up as my brain made a few jumps and my quick mouth followed with a question, “Do you know any place I can play basketball around here?” Surprised by my sudden burst of energy, she met me with a grin. She quickly followed by telling me, “Oh there is a group that plays every week.” I was happy as a clam when she told me she would introduce me to the group.

Since they are our “elders” living in Kuala Lumpur and especially in Mont Kiara, we peppered them with all kinds of questions from their experience of quality of life in Malaysia to highly recommended restaurants in Mont Kiara. Satisfied with their experiences similarly matched with ours and even more satisfied with their recommendations, we said goodbye, until next time.

For a good month in June, we were given a brand-new car to use with all the plastics still covering the seats not unlike opening a brand-new laptop for the first time. A family who was to arrive in KL bought their car and it arrived well ahead of time. They graciously allowed us to use their car without us asking. After having thought twice about the offer, I decided to accept. After having driven on the right side of the car a few times before in addition to the growing familiarity with KL traffic and its flow, I was ready.

With me at the helm of the driver seat, one of the joy-filled excursions involved hitting Bib Gourmand restaurants in KL. I quickly discovered there were a total of 66 restaurants in KL that received either Michelin star(s) or Bib Gourmand selections. If you are not familiar, Bib Gourmand's selection means while the restaurants are not serving “boundary-pushing, unique” cuisines, they are still the best in offering “comforting favorites.” After “circling” the Bib Gourmand restaurants, often with one dollar sign (two at the most) attached to them, within a 10-mile radius, we were in exploration mode donning my fav KÜHL shorts with two side pockets and a pair of flip-flops. With my wife happily obliged by my side, this was a small luxury and a big fun which was not on my joy radar earlier. By now, we must have visited about 7 so far. Mostly very happy with the experience and even happier with the price of our meals.

Apart from the Bib Gourmand excursions, we also found an outstanding sushi place (which by the way was the first restaurant our new friend mentioned) within a short walking distance from our place which we frequent every time our stomach calls for sushi. Their nigiri sushi, and our favorite Chirashi Sushi, is as good as what we had from some of the best in the US and Japan. Their lunch special nigiri sushi is comparable with the price of the McDonald’s Big Mac sandwich in the US! Just yesterday, we had the best Thai food we have ever had in a mall we frequent. After noticing that the restaurant was always crowded, we decided to check it out ourselves. We ordered temptingly spicey Mango Salad, Seafood Pad Thai, what they call Drunken Seafood Master (gotta love the name) which is assorted seafood stew soup, and Claypot Rice mixed with minced pork, eggplants, and sambal (plus a pandan drink). After my first bite of everything, my entire face approved, and I was giddy with joie de vivre—I would have made Phil Rosenthal as in Somebody Feed Phil proud. Even better, we walked out with the bill that would make our friends in the US, Korea, and Singapore upset. I ate so much that we walked the entire length of the mall back and forth to digest.

This portion will read more like an afterthought, but it does tie things together. . . So if you have the patience, keep reading.

I have always liked John O’Donohue’s work and drank deeply from the well of his writings over the years. His Celtic spiritual heritage and imagination with his love for rugged and pristine nature and freedom rang true with mine. While I grieve his untimely death (he would be only 68 years old today), I have discovered his long-standing friendship with another Irish poet and author, David Whyte. Over time, I have come to appreciate Whyte’s works. Ok, that was a long-winded intro to what I wanted to share below by David Whyte, aptly called, We Are Here.

We are here essentially, to risk ourselves in the world. We are a form of invitation to others and to otherness, we are meant to hazard ourselves for the right thing, for the right woman or the right man, for a son or a daughter, for the right work or for a gift given against all the odds. And in all this continual risking the most profound courage may be found in the greatest risk and the greatest vulnerability, and perhaps, the greatest prize of all, the simple willingness to allow ourselves to be happy along the way …

First of all and very briefly, it is not lost on me that Whyte included “otherness”—his generous inclusion of all creation. Now to the main point: It does not escape our mind that we are here, in Asia, to risk and to risk continually. The reminder to allow ourselves to be happy along the way, perhaps the greatest prize of all, amid the greatest risk and vulnerability, cannot come at a better time. To risk is not merely to suffer for the sake of the goal or the prize. Since to hope is to risk, with frustrations and heartaches, not risking is giving up on hope. To risk means to touch the ground, smell the ground, and open and enjoy the gifts of happiness (and even to feel the goodness in our mouths).